{"id":194,"date":"2009-07-28T02:33:00","date_gmt":"2009-07-28T02:33:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/originalorknot.com\/?p=194"},"modified":"2014-06-03T17:35:29","modified_gmt":"2014-06-03T17:35:29","slug":"bad-jokes-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/originalorknot.com\/?p=194","title":{"rendered":"Bad jokes"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>One of my nephews was at camp a few weeks ago, and his mom contacted some people and asked us to email him while he was there. The camp prints out emails and gives them to the campers at mail call. Since I didn&#8217;t really have all that much to chat about, at least that he would have cared about, I sent him riddles and one liners all week. <span style=\"font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;\">Yes, I had a whole week&#8217;s worth. <span style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\">Plus some.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<p>Here&#8217;s a sample.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-style: italic;\">On Tuesday:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">     How do you kill a circus?<\/li>\n<li>     <span style=\"color: rgb(51, 51, 255);\"><span style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">Go for the juggler!<\/span> <\/span>    [that&#8217;s one of my favorites]<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>     <span style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">What does the Gingerbread Boy have on his bed?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">     <span style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">Cookie sheets.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">\n<li>     What do you get when you cross a skunk with a teddy bear?<\/li>\n<li>     <span style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">Winnie the PEEYEW!<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-style: italic;\">On Wednesday:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">     Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship?<\/li>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">     <span style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">The sailors were marooned!<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">\n<li>     Why did Bill take a fig to the movies?<\/li>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">     Because he couldn&#8217;t find a date!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">\n<li>     What would happen if Satan lost his hair?<\/li>\n<li>     <span style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">There would be hell toupee!<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-style: italic;\">On Thursday:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">     What do you get if you cross a turtle with a porcupine?<\/li>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">     A slowpoke!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">\n<li>     <span style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">What do you get if you cross an electric eel with a sponge?<\/span><\/li>\n<li>     A shock absorber! <\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">\n<li>     <span style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">What did the hat say to the scarf?<\/span><\/li>\n<li>     You hang around while I go on ahead.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-style: italic;\">On Friday:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">     Why do blonde nurses carry a red Magic Marker?<\/li>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">     In case they have to draw blood! <\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">\n<li>     <span style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">What do you get when you cross a kangaroo and a snake?<\/span><\/li>\n<li>     A jump rope!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">\n<li>     <span style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?<\/span><\/li>\n<li>     Pilgrims!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-style: italic;\">On Saturday:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">     Which Knight Invented the round Table?<\/li>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">     Circumference!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">\n<li>     Which Knight makes pottery?<\/li>\n<li style=\"color: rgb(102, 0, 204);\">     Ceramic!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">     <\/span><\/p>\n<ul style=\"color: rgb(204, 0, 0);\">\n<li>Two thousand pounds of hair fell off a truck today and blocked the road. State Police are still combing the area.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>You know, I really ought to know more ten-year-olds.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>One of my nephews was at camp a few weeks ago, and his mom contacted some people and asked us to email him while he was there. The camp prints out emails and gives them to the campers at mail call. Since I didn&#8217;t really have all that much to chat about, at least that [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/originalorknot.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/194"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/originalorknot.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/originalorknot.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/originalorknot.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/originalorknot.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=194"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/originalorknot.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/194\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/originalorknot.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=194"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/originalorknot.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=194"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/originalorknot.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=194"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}